Somewhere

              Why? Is a question anyone and everyone that want to join the PC is asked, it never fails, you even have to answer this question when applying for this job. So my answer to this question is, at 17, a PCVR- a returned peace corps volunteer came to my high school and told us about his story. The way he spoke about his time in Africa and the passion he felt about the PC. I knew just sitting their this is what I wanted to do.  I had plans to become a nurse and do nurses without borders as a senior in high school. Plans changed in my head as this  to join the PC, get my nurses degree, and then do NWB. But after doing some research and talking to the PCVR, found out my skills, such as playing sports doesn't really qualify me as a good candidate and I need to go to college first, develop marketable skills. The PCVR also told me I needed to start volunteer now and until I left with the PC. That next day I told a person that I hold in high regards my plans and his reaction, said their is no way I could something like this and my services were better used in other areas. At first it really hurt but as you tell more people they have the same reaction, so you can do two things, let the dream fade or reach for it. That next week I started volunteering at a local hospital and the experience change me.

        My very first week as a volunteer in the hospital, I met one of those people you never forget, those ones that step in your life right at the time you need them and fade away as fast as they came but leave marks on your heart. This person was Robin. She was a very sweet women whom was in the hospital on the wrong floor due to limit space in the hospital. Robin was there to get her second leg amputated because of complications with her illness. I remember the first time I came in her room and asked if she wanted a magazine and newspaper, she was getting her hair washed and she said so sweetly come back when my hair looks nice. The nurse was not so happy to see me.
          My time as a volunteer gave me a real view of nurses, not that they are all this way but most of the nurse on said floor were rude to me and not so friendly to their patients. I know some wonderful nurses and the stress of the job can take its toll but as a teenager it change my idea of being a nurse and from volunteering I realised I didn't want a job that made me rude and grumpy all the time.
               Anyways back to Robin, later during my shift which was Tuesday from 4-8, I revisited Robin, to her delight her was freshly washed and clean. As I walked in she said it been 4 days since my hair was washed and I just need it for my spirits (this I hear comes in handy in the PC when you get to use a shower). Robin proceed to tell me about her life and why she was in the hospital. This lasted way past my shift and was forced out of her room. She made my first day very easy and for the next month she made it even better. The patients on my floor were only suppose to be on the floor for a few day to  a week max but Robin ended up being on the floor for a whole month. So my one day a week, ended up being 2 days a week and once I even came in 3 times just to talked to her. Robin was always happy, never bitter or resentful for losing her legs when I met her. She told me the first time she lost her first leg, she was mean. I had a hard time believing this but she told me how she started to become depressed and take things out on her family. It was a dark time in her life, she kept thinking about all she had left behind when she lost her leg. She said my family was losing me and I was losing them, it all change when she saw  the effect on her young son. He didn't want to spend time with here because "Mommy was mean" After hearing this she changed. Change her attitude, made new dreams and had her family back. So this time around she was going to be happy about losing the second leg, because there was no third one to lose but her family she could lose. Robin said life is not about being bitter about bad things, life is about making bitter sweet, good and let it move on as you continue on with life, continue on with your dreams. Robin then asked about my dreams and I told her about the PCVR and she said your going to be a great PCV, never let bitter in others or yourself stop you because bitter doesn't taste good. Always smile and see the sweet in everything you do. This has always stayed with me, at times I can admitted that I forgot to sweetened the bitter in my life, but once I start to move past I simply start to stay those words she said to me in our last private conversation.  The last time I meet her husband and sons. They were so loving and supportive of her. I still wonder where she is and what she is doing? I wish I could show her and thank her for being one of the first people to encourage me on this journey.  Its strange how strangers can be the ones to truly touch our hearts.

        So this lead me to going to College, car accident which lead to being sued, strange signs to start application, getting medical deferred and the steps and signs to getting back to the PC. From the start I knew my dreams were over the rainbow, waiting of me and not just in the clouds! I now know why this is my favorite movie since first seeing as a child, can not wait to wake up on the other side of the clouds far far away. Here are my three favorite version of the songs.